{"id":183,"date":"2010-07-17T12:37:56","date_gmt":"2010-07-17T12:37:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/janinajacobs.com\/?p=183"},"modified":"2011-01-31T05:20:56","modified_gmt":"2011-01-31T05:20:56","slug":"gender-benders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/golf\/183\/gender-benders","title":{"rendered":"Golf with the Opposite Sex (It Can Be Done)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>“I never have much fun playing golf with my husband,” confided one 50-something woman as she shrugged her shoulders in the ‘I give up’ mode\u00a0on the 5th tee of a charity scramble.<\/p>\n

“Playing with my wife is……well, you know……kind of frustrating,” admitted the aforementioned husband as he chop-sliced one out of bounds.\u00a0 “Then, when I try to help her, she gets mad.\u00a0 I don’t understand her.\u00a0 You’d think she would appreciate my advice since I’ve played the game so long.”<\/p>\n

Hmmmm, perhaps the fact that this fellow couldn’t break 100 had something to do with his wife’s inattentiveness toward her hubby’s advice?<\/p>\n

What is it about men and women playing golf together that so disrupts the normal, if there is<\/em> such a thing, mentality?\u00a0\u00a0 Golf, like life, truly brings out the differences between men and women focusing on the same goal: mastery of a very complicated game.\u00a0 Many men want to play the\u00a0knight in shining armor and help the little lady, which is admirable\u00a0 though a tad misguided.\u00a0 The ladies might welcome the assistance if the gent was a top player, a great teacher, and…..a hunk.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Gentlemen, if you don’t qualify on two out of three counts, simply play your own game and forget about hers, no matter how much you want to show her.\u00a0 If she asks, be gentle and don’t try to give too much information too soon.\u00a0 Stick with basic fundamentals and you won’t go wrong.\u00a0 What…..you don’t know basic fundamentals???<\/p>\n

Now\u00a0is the\u00a0prime time for outings and golf events, many of which will involve mixed foursomes.\u00a0 Here are some tips to survive the season:<\/p>\n

For women:<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Thank well meaning men for their swing advice, then ignore it.\u00a0 My father taught me that when I was 8 years old and the advice still stands.<\/p>\n

– If you are the best golfer in the group, don’t be afraid to take charge or at least be assertive about the group’s playing strategy.<\/p>\n

– Be bold.\u00a0 Accept a bet within your group or another team.<\/p>\n

– Don’t be a wimp and moan about what a bad golfer you think you are.\u00a0 They already know, and you’re playing with them, right?<\/p>\n

– Lighten up.\u00a0 Don’t take yourself too seriously;\u00a0 loosen up and enjoy the humor of the day.\u00a0 If the jokes get too harsh or seedy, walk away and practice your swing.\u00a0 Don’t be the spoil-sport or Pollyanna in the group because you may not get asked back again.\u00a0 Or, tell some jokes of your own.<\/p>\n

– Use serious golf balls.\u00a0\u00a0Nothing against Paula Creamer, but please don’t\u00a0use pink golf balls no matter how much you like them, unless you don’t care what people think – and what woman doesn’t care about that?\u00a0 The crystal balls are tolerable and actually kind of distinct, so use those instead if you like.\u00a0\u00a0 Pink tees are OK – I’ve seen men use them frequently.<\/p>\n

– Memorize these words:\u00a0 ‘Don’t worry.\u00a0 It’ll play.”<\/p>\n

For men:<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Don’t volunteer swing advice unless you are asked for it.\u00a0 Ever.<\/p>\n

– Do not comment on what an advantage the ladies have from the Forward Tees.\u00a0 They don’t want to hear it and likely need every bit of yardage the distance gap offers.\u00a0 In fact, quite often it is not nearly enough.<\/p>\n

– If your significant other or any other woman\u00a0hits a crummy shot and you both know it, don’t say ‘nice shot, dear’ just because it is airborne.\u00a0 Women know when they’ve hit a terrible shot and do not want to be patronized.\u00a0 Remember though, the 100-yard shot that does get airborne may just be that particular player’s best shot.\u00a0 You’ll figure it out quickly enough.<\/p>\n

– Do include women in strategic discussions in scrambles.\u00a0 Let them know what you need them to do, even if it’s\u00a0simply getting the ball in play.<\/p>\n

– If nature calls, please wait for a proper facility.\u00a0 If you can’t possibly wait, apologize to the ladies and go where they will absolutely not see you.<\/p>\n

– Memorize these words: ‘Don’t worry.\u00a0 It’ll play.”<\/p>\n

Genderless:<\/strong><\/p>\n

–\u00a0Never criticize or yell at your partner for hitting\u00a0 a bad shot.\u00a0 No one intentionally misses a short putt or tries to hit the ball into a lilac bush or water hazard.\u00a0 It will be your turn soon enough and you’ll appreciate the compassion.<\/p>\n

– Don’t agonize over a missed putt or botched shot.\u00a0 Another one will certainly be right around the corner.\u00a0 It’s over.\u00a0 Move on.<\/p>\n

– No eyeball-rolling, head-shaking, loud sighs, or clucking.\u00a0 Please.<\/p>\n

– Do not\u00a0call any rules unless you know what you are talking about and can prove it.\u00a0 In a Scramble, it isn’t likely any rules questions will come up, except for possibly teeing in front of the markers.\u00a0 If you see that happening, it is OK to ask the person to tee up behind the tee markers.\u00a0 Usually it is an honest\u00a0mistake.\u00a0 If you see flagrant etiquette violations, wait until after the round is over and discuss it then…..unless it is so bad it cannot wait.\u00a0 Embarrassing someone is never correct.<\/p>\n

– Don’t remind him\/her of the time he\/she hit three balls into the water on the hole you’re about to play.\u00a0 He\/She knows.<\/p>\n

– Stay OFF of the cell phone.\u00a0 If you must return an important call or text, go somewhere private where no one will see you.\u00a0 And unless you’re a doctor (or a musician like me who is always on call for funerals where an answer on my availability is needed immediately), you really can wait a couple hours to return calls.\u00a0 After all, what did you do before cell phones?\u00a0 You waited until you could get to a phone inside the clubhouse.<\/p>\n

Following these guidelines should make for more enjoyable golf.\u00a0 The game is difficult enough without complicating matters by forcing your playing partners to worry about doing everything exactly right all the time.\u00a0 As I said to the ladies…….lighten up.\u00a0 Have fun.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Getting along with the opposite sex on the golf course is easy if you follow these simple tips….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":31,"featured_media":212,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,1495,18],"tags":[4856],"class_list":["post-183","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-golf","category-what-do-women-want","category-lifestyle","tag-opposite-sex-golf-issues"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/24\/2010\/07\/FLI003.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/183","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/31"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=183"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/183\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":678,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/183\/revisions\/678"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/212"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=183"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=183"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/janinajacobs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=183"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}