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<\/a>The Hill School's Headmaster David Dougherty<\/p><\/div>\n
David R. Dougherty, Headmaster of The Hill School, one of America\u2019s truly elite preparatory schools in Pottstown, Pennsylvania addressed the 159th<\/sup> commencement class in 2010 with just this phrase.\u00a0 \u201cBe Nice.\u201d<\/p>\n Dougherty went on to say, \u201cIt\u2019s the simplest social stance, the way you should greet the world.\u00a0 It requires little thought, only the decision to be nice and not mean.\u00a0 It\u2019s the way you treat everyone, no matter what, without thought, plan, design.\u00a0 Just be nice.\u201d<\/p>\n Beyond all our differences of opinion on so many things, Mr. Dougherty\u2019s simple statement is so exquisite, makes so much sense, and is still so very timely.<\/p>\n Mr. Dougherty went on to compare how we have actually begun to imitate the invective language first used by the villains of professional wrestling.\u00a0 Only now you will see the smack-talking athletes, cable news show hosts, television actors, and even elected officials as well as hopeful candidates for public office exhibiting the same behavior as the wrestlers.\u00a0 He pleaded for his Hill graduates to not act like that, but rather to be nice, be kind, and be civil.<\/p>\n Being nice only takes a second.\u00a0\u00a0 Being kind takes time; sometimes a lot for it\u2019s a different kind of commitment.\u00a0 Being kind involves showing real care and spending heartfelt time with others, perhaps to stop and chat, not merely to be friendly but to check up on a friend, to share your life and time with others.\u00a0 And when we ask a heartfelt question, we must also be prepared to listen to the answer.<\/p>\n You never know how your kindness will impact others.\u00a0 Mr. Dougherty then related to the graduates the following story.\u00a0 \u201cI spoke in my office once to a Hill School student who had appeared for a serious offense before our Discipline Committee.\u00a0 She explained that after offering a thoughtful statement to the committee and an apology for her actions, then answering question about them, she had listened to her faculty adviser and then a good friend speak as her advocates who told the committee about her:\u00a0 her compassion for others, her playfulness with her little brother, her weekly phone calls to her sick grandmother, her regular visits to her Latin teacher for extra help.\u00a0 And as this student recalled all of this for me, she began to cry, \u2018Why are you crying?\u2019 I asked.\u00a0 Because she said, \u2018Those two really understood me.\u00a0 They said kind things about me that I thought no one ever noticed.\u00a0 And they stood by me at a really tough time.\u00a0 But the hardest part for me,\u2019 she said, \u2018was to realize how much time they had taken to prepare their statements.\u00a0 For me, because I messed up.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n Sometimes I am perplexed that with all the emphasis in America on different religions, we still resort to aggressive opinions, judgments, and actions \u2013 casting fear, anger, and judgment on those who don\u2019t agree with us.\u00a0 Why can\u2019t we simply practice the religion of kindness?\u00a0 How about just being nice and kind to each other?\u00a0 For me, I have finally discovered that giving kindness and service to others is \u201cheaven on earth.\u201d\u00a0 Yes, sometimes I stray, but Mr. Dougherty\u2019s simple wisdom of \u201cBe nice\u201d is such a cogent reminder.<\/p>\n Being nice is a cousin to living with love, with \u201ckindness\u201d being a brother or sister in the family of love.\u00a0 We can choose to live with fear and we can also live so preoccupied with ourselves in our very busy ways that we fail to notice and appreciate others.\u00a0 Then we can also choose to live with love and kindness and the appreciative awareness of all the beauty surrounding us.\u00a0 To be nice to others is such a splendid start and so well stated Mr. Dougherty.<\/p>\n At The Hill School, teachers or instructors are called \u201cMasters\u201d and with this wonderful lesson, I can easily appreciate why David Dougherty is the \u201cHead Master.\u201d\u00a0 Ever the teacher, I thank you Mr. Dougherty for such a splendid lesson!<\/p>\n P.S.\u00a0 I am a biased and proud Hill School graduate (Class of 1969) and have recently learned that Mr. Dougherty and his wife, Kay, will retire from The Hill School in June 2012.\u00a0 Though I have never had the pleasure of meeting the Dougherty\u2019s, I have long heard of their many remarkable contributions to the School since they came there in 1993.<\/p>\n