{"id":4632,"date":"2011-07-23T15:37:21","date_gmt":"2011-07-23T22:37:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/robertfagan.com\/?p=4632"},"modified":"2011-08-21T15:32:26","modified_gmt":"2011-08-21T22:32:26","slug":"golfs-three-dirtiest-words-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/commentary\/4632\/golfs-three-dirtiest-words-3","title":{"rendered":"Golf’s Three Dirtiest Words"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>\u201cYou\u2019re still away\u201d is not the only bad three-word phrase in golf.\u00a0 There are plenty more.\u00a0 Read \u2018em and weep!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

1.\u00a0 Pick it up!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

2.\u00a0 Where\u2019s my wedge?\u00a0 (Headcover, cell phone, camera, wallet, etc.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

3.\u00a0\u00a0 It’s behind you!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

4.\u00a0\u00a0 You\u2019re still away.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

5.\u00a0\u00a0 How much longer?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

6.\u00a0 Not this again!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

7.\u00a0 See the ripples?\u00a0 (See that splash?)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

8.\u00a0 Hit a house.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

9.\u00a0 I hurt myself.\u00a0 (Are you hurt?)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

10. It\u2019s in deeper!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

11. Still your turn.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

12. Is that lightning?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

13. Where\u2019d that go?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

14. Forgot my putter!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>

Remember him?<\/p><\/div>\n

15. Course Closed Today.\u00a0 (Sorry Course Closed)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

16. Not enough club.\u00a0 (Too much club.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

17. Have another ball?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

18. Is that good?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

19. That is unplayable.\u00a0 (lost, gone, goodbye, etc.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

20. Play a provisional.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

21. Tournament is cancelled.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

22. Greens just aerified.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

23. My shaft\u2019s broken.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

24. Don\u2019t go left!\u00a0 (right, long, short, O.B., etc.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

25. You looked up!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

26. Your husband play?\u00a0 (to a man)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

27. Toss me another.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

28. Where\u2019s the bathroom?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

29. Anyone see that?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>30. You play before?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

31. I\u2019ve seen worse.\u00a0 (Better than most.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

32. This game sucks!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

33. Another one lost!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

34. Out of bounds.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

35. Wanna trade partners?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

36. Pick it up.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

37. Who built this?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

38. Cart Paths Only.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

39. The decision stands.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

40. One Mulligan Please.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

41. Had another three-putt.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

42. Is that OB?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

43. Better play out!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

44. Out of beer!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>45. Is anyone hurt?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

46. Need extra balls?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

47. In the drink.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

48. You made seven.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

49. What was that!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

50. Wife on phone.\u00a0 (Boss)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

51. You’d better re-tee.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

52. That\u2019s two strokes.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

53. I got stung.\u00a0 (bit, caught, hurt, etc.)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

54. Left it short.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

55. Get a medic!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

56. Take a mulligan.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

57. Had a snowman.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

58. Run it out!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

59. No shorts allowed.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

60. I lost count.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

61. There\u2019s always tomorrow.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

62. Where\u2019s your lipstick?\u00a0 (to a man)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

63. Give you strokes?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

64. Speed it up!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

65. Still your turn.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

66. Take a drop.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

67. Broke my club.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

68. Can\u2019t get there.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

69. That\u2019s a penalty.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

70. You are disqualified.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n\"\"<\/a>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cYou\u2019re still away\u201d is not the only bad three-word phrase in golf.\u00a0 There are plenty more.\u00a0 Read \u2018em and weep!… Read more »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":41,"featured_media":4749,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[334,2883],"tags":[1046270,90578],"class_list":["post-4632","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-commentary","category-golf-bits","tag-golf","tag-dirty-words"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/33\/2011\/07\/monkey112.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4632","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/41"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4632"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4632\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5321,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4632\/revisions\/5321"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4749"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4632"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4632"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/robertfagan\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4632"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}