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<\/a>\nAre you stressed out with your partner, finances, parents, decisions or work? How about children, neighbors, a supplier or co-worker, or your health? Have they even bunched up on you? Sometimes it\u2019s not easy to admit that your circumstances and how you have managed them (or not) have conspired to frustrate the hell out of you, maybe even drive you to dis-ease and depression. Here is a highly successful process I\u2019ve used to free others up while remaining responsible.<\/p>\n
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Whether we realize it or not, we are either part of a team in some extended manner, or a relationship. It\u2019s extremely difficult to be in a healthy relationship or a member of a functioning team (whatever role you have) if you are not healthily independent first yourself. A healthy independence at some level is essential as your primary defense against stress. It is critical to your physical and mental health.<\/p>\n
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Once I had a CEO share with me that they were in the midst of a crucial Board of Directors Meeting. He had managed his company and this sort of a meeting as a democracy listening to everything and everybody, but realized this and began to correct himself by saying \u201cNo,\u201d but that was very difficult. Within ninety minutes the Vice President of Drama exclaimed, \u201cYou\u2019re the CEO, but you can\u2019t handle this. You are crumbling and losing control.\u00a0 You\u2019re buckling!\u201d The CEO exclaimed out of character, \u201cShut up. I\u2019m taking a nap.\u201d\u00a0 He left the meeting, went to his office and took a 20-minute nap. He then came back and concluded the meeting in a successful business-like manner. He felt great and apparently so did everyone else, as they never challenged him that way again.<\/p>\n
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As a former CEO, there have been times when I wish I employed that same tactic \u2013 of pausing, resting, and regaining control. We can all do this and need to periodically do so in our lives.\u00a0The following exercise is to literally become the CEO of your life and here\u2019s a quick outline of how.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n <\/p>\n YOU are the CEO (Chief Executive Officer) and your life is your company. <\/em><\/strong>In this role, you have the responsibility to answer for yourself the following ten questions. First call together a meeting of your Board of Directors and staff where you set the agenda. Yes, the VP of Popularity, the VP of Guilt, VP of Pleasing, Health, Success, and Finances, etc. are all there, but YOU set the agenda.(These are all aspects of your life that are important and affect you.)<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 1.\u00a0\u00a0 Determine your mission statement.\u00a0 In a sentence, determine who you are? What is your primary mission in life? What factors would determine your corporation\u2019s success?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 2.\u00a0\u00a0 What does your corporation primarily do and for whom? What is your vocation? By answering this, you can establish what your primary tasks are. These may change in time, but how about now?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 3.\u00a0\u00a0 What are your policies and procedures?\u00a0 What are the underlying beliefs as well as the values and strategies you\u2019ve been employing? As the CEO you have immediate and full authority to make any changes you want at any time. Sound empowering? Actually, you are the very one who has been the CEO of your corporation (life) so now is the time to step forward and acknowledge that. And if your Vice Presidents balk at this, acknowledge and thank them, but remind them that your life is no democracy and you are its architect. And if you inherited your mission statement and values from someone else, remind yourself that this is now your company and not theirs.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 4.\u00a0\u00a0 What are your priorities? As a consultant, I will encourage you to first consider yourself \u2013 self-actualization and your basic human needs. Remember, this is not managing other\u2019s corporations or bailing out anyone else \u2013 getting your house in order first is the main order of the day. Is your corporation a love-based or fear-based one? What would I as an external consultant observe? Are you based more on competition or conversely collaboration, communication, and collaboration? Do you innovate and actually act upon your innovations (thought vs. action).<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 5.\u00a0\u00a0 What are your corporation\u2019s internal and external resources? What inner resources have you already developed and what might you improve upon. Who might help you?\u00a0 Are you already getting the results you want from your external resources? If not, are there other methods or strategies you might try? Are you forever in the planning processes and never get into the market?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 6.\u00a0\u00a0 Who are your trusted advisors? Do you lean toward your heart and your gut or is it your head. Organizational development experts will caution you to be aware of your head, because it is in partnership with your ego and will often lie to you and create battles even when there are really none.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 7.\u00a0\u00a0 Is there a good quality control as to who is hired (who you associate with) and what resources come into your corporation?\u00a0 Is there a spirit of health and cooperation within your corporation or are people sick and busy fighting one another?\u00a0 In your life this may equate to exercise, diet, sleep, prayer, love, and forgiveness.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 8.\u00a0\u00a0 Make a list of the shareholders in your corporation. These are the people who have an ownership stake in your life and may have a vote. Place a value on their ownership. If you have a partner or family, parents or boss, they may get more votes than a well-intentioned friend or neighbor.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 9.\u00a0\u00a0 What do you sell your share of your corporation for? Do you sell them for approval, for love, for pleasure, or for money? Do you sell them for sex, alcohol, drugs, anger, hate, fear or some non-operating addiction? Are you open and willing<\/em> to look at other options?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 10.\u00a0\u00a0 Can you buy your shares of your corporation back and would you? Successful corporations that like their prospects will often buy their shares back because they have an \u201cinsider\u2019s view\u201d and feel their share’s value is under-valued. I like this strategy as it dilutes my value less and provides me more control. For example, if you believe you given away too much control to someone or you\u2019ve let them cross your boundaries, maybe it\u2019s time to quickly and quietly buy back their shares and regain control of your corporation. In life you don’t even have to announce it, you just do it!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Now this meeting will not be your last one. They need not be lengthy. Whether you schedule a daily meditation or quiet time, you as the CEO intuitively know when to pause and check so don\u2019t ignore your body\u2019s signals nor your intuition.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n In this way, just as a good CEO organizes and captains his organization\u2019s success, so too should you. Once you have stopped to assess and gain some semblance of organization, those other worldly forces won\u2019t have their same negative impact for you\u2019ll be stronger and centered \u2013 living an aware, delicious life and capitalizing upon your assets!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"