{"id":27,"date":"2015-02-08T05:54:39","date_gmt":"2015-02-08T05:54:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/?p=27"},"modified":"2015-02-11T15:43:41","modified_gmt":"2015-02-11T15:43:41","slug":"real-life-tiger-talk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/golf\/personalities\/27\/real-life-tiger-talk","title":{"rendered":"Real Life Tiger Excuses"},"content":{"rendered":"

“It’s just my glutes are shutting off,” he said. “Then they don’t activate and then, hence, it goes into my lower back. So, I tried to activate my glutes as best I could, in between, but it just they never stayed activated.”<\/em><\/p>\n

Tiger Woods after his withdrawal from the Farmers Insurance Open<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My spreadsheet is not tying out? I activated the formulas but they must not have stayed activated.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Homework is hard and my brain is, like, shutting off. I tried to activate my brain but it just shut off, awright. Hence, TV<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I tried to activate the engine and it really activated. In fact, I don\u2019t know, Officer, how it activated so much. It must have been my glutes.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My groins are shutting off to you. They don’t activate and then it goes to my head. I tried to activate my groins as best I could and they just never stayed activated.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

You ordered the steak medium? Well, apparently the heat activated the meat up to a temperature that was lower than you ordered. And, well, to be honest, the grill cook\u2019s got a hammy. Can I bring you something else?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Glute activation is a hoax, Congressman. One can\u2019t just decide to turn on and turn off glutes. They are always on.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“It’s just my glutes are shutting off,” he said. “Then they don’t activate and then, hence, it goes into my… Read more »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":149,"featured_media":36,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-27","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-personalities"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/78\/2015\/02\/TW-winces.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/149"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=27"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27\/revisions\/32"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/36"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=27"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=27"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theaposition.com\/vanfossen\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=27"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}