Pause. Would you really want to trade places with Elon Musk? What would you pay to do so?
So you want to have fame and fortune? That’s a prevalent message into today’s society. Think again. I came to view this first-hand in working with some of my clients who had attained both … and were not happy.
When we see someone living the dream, it’s easy to get swept up in admiration and envy. Maybe it’s a famous artist who travels the world, an entrepreneur with a successful company, or a social media influencer whose life seems like one endless adventure. Maybe it’s a famous athlete or performer. It’s easy to look at their lifestyle and think, I want that. But every achievement comes with its own price tag, and the costs aren’t always obvious at first glance. What are the tradeoffs of the life you’re dreaming about, and are you truly willing to pay them?
Take today’s wealthiest individual, Elon Musk, as an example. Musk’s achievements with Tesla, SpaceX, Starlink, and more are awe-inspiring, and his lifestyle is a far cry from ordinary. But Musk is famous for his grueling work ethic. He’s known to work up to 100 hours a week, often sleeping on factory floors or in the office. In interviews, he’s talked openly about the mental and emotional toll of his relentless schedule. He once said, “If you need inspiring words, don’t do it.” Musk’s success didn’t come from talent alone; it came from extreme dedication and sacrificing personal time, relationships, and sleep. It’s easy to want his results, but living his life would mean saying goodbye to a lot of things most of us take for granted. If Musk is truly happy, he is likely differently wired than you or me.
Or consider Beyoncé, one of the most successful and admired musicians of our time. Her performances are flawless, her albums groundbreaking, and her lifestyle seems glamorous. But behind the scenes, Beyoncé is known for her tireless work ethic, sometimes rehearsing for months to get a performance just right. She once shared, “I remember being in the studio at 4:00 a.m. watching my body shut down.” The price of her success is relentless practice, sacrifice, and years of intense discipline. Beyoncé’s fame and fortune didn’t happen by accident; they’re the result of countless hours of hard work, often at the expense of sleep, free time, and even her own health. Athletes and performers may love their craft and be driven to excellence, but how long do they crave or can they tolerate the unyielding attention.
Yes, there’s another cost that comes with fame and influence – the loss of privacy. For someone like Beyoncé or Elon Musk, privacy is rare, if not impossible. Every move they make is photographed and scrutinized by the public, and their personal lives are often splashed across headlines. Privacy is sacrificed as part of the package. Even their family members can’t escape the spotlight, leading to a life where the lines between public and personal blur. Imagine not being able to walk down the street, dine out, or even make a mistake without it becoming public knowledge. Your quiet or private moments with others are often interrupted. For many, this constant exposure would feel overwhelming.
Social media influencers also paint a glamorous picture, with perfect photos and seemingly endless vacations. But maintaining a successful online presence is a full-time job. Photoshoots, brand partnerships, constant content creation, and the pressure to look flawless 24/7 are just a few of the demands. Influencer Sarah Nicole Landry once revealed, “People think I’m traveling and having fun all the time, but it’s actually a lot of work, constant deadlines, and maintaining an image.” On top of that, influencers sacrifice their privacy. Every post, every “real” moment is out there for public consumption, and with it, they lose a little bit of themselves. Followers often feel entitled to comment on their lives, and even strangers have opinions about their relationships, homes, and families. The reality is that creating a perfect life online can be exhausting, with influencers often sacrificing privacy, personal relationships, and mental well-being just to keep up.
It’s not just celebrities who make these tradeoffs. Think of a top CEO in any field – they might have power, wealth, and influence, but their schedules are packed, and the stakes are constantly high. The stress is intense, and free time is often a luxury. Many high-ranking executives miss out on family time, and the pressure can take a toll on mental health. Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, once said, “There’s no such thing as work-life balance. There’s work, and there’s life, and there’s no way to balance it all perfectly.” And just like with celebrities and influencers, CEOs may find their personal lives and private decisions exposed to the public, especially if they lead a major brand.
Safety and security are additional, often overlooked costs of success. For those in the public eye, fame can invite unwanted attention and even threats. Celebrities and public figures often need private security teams or surveillance measures to protect themselves and their families. This constant vigilance can be draining, adding an extra layer of stress to everyday life. High-profile individuals may face security risks that most of us never consider – from stalkers to data breaches, they live with the reality that their personal safety is at stake. For some, success means sacrificing not only privacy but also peace of mind, as they’re forced to take extraordinary measures just to feel secure.
So, what does all this mean for us? Before we start chasing someone else’s results, we should consider the costs behind the scenes. Are we ready to work those long hours, to say “no” to weekend plans, to accept a relentless schedule, and possibly sacrifice our privacy or safety? Often, we admire the final product without realizing that sacrifices come hand-in-hand with success.
This isn’t to say you shouldn’t dream big – by all means, go after your goals! But understanding what’s required helps you make an informed decision about whether that path is right for you. Knowing the real costs can also help you design a version of success that fits your life. Maybe you want the creative freedom of a musician but with more time for family. Perhaps you want the influence of a CEO but with a flexible schedule. Success doesn’t have to look the same for everyone, and understanding the costs can help you find a balance that works for you.
So, next time you see someone with the life you admire, take a moment to look beyond the surface. Ask yourself, What sacrifices did they make to get there? And more importantly, What am I willing to trade for my own dreams? Success is a wonderful pursuit, but it’s most rewarding when it aligns with the life you truly want.
Bob Fagan has just published “The Little Book of Questions That Matter — A Lifetime Companion For Transforming Your Life.” It is available on Amazon.
