Yes, don’t get married to your ‘bucket lists.”
If my more “successful” clients have any message, it’s that “bigger, better, faster, and more” are not all they’re made out to be and have failed them. The “bucket list” is a great example. While often presented as a motivational tool, it often ends up being like chasing a sunset while traveling east – and one becoming lost in the process. These lists’ utility are short-lived and leave one either unsatisfied or worse, depressed. While goals are, indeed, useful, I’ve seen bucket list suggestions disappoint too many times to continue prescribing them. We might be reminded that we are not human doings, but human beings.
In one area of my life, I completed a pretty impressive series of bucket list accomplishments. While their accomplishment might have inferred me or my experiences as interesting by some or even curried me favor, minor celebrity, some income, or even employment, they never really added to my overall health or happiness. My intense focus on them caused other things to fall out of alignment and suffer. I began to discover the same echoed by many of my more newsworthy clients. Their attainment brought little and their delay brought worse for they had become so identified with their lists. They had become so overly committed to their lists that they forgot to simply be, slow down and enjoy their journeys no matter how many items would be checked off.
Living fulfilled is more about living awake, vulnerably with what is, rather than what could be, should be, or would be. It’s also about finding ways to grow, learn, and connect with others. It’s not about speed or how many. While your “bucket lists” may be a useful self-organizing tool and not inherently bad, be careful about going overboard with them. Have fun with them, but keep your balance and alignment. They are simply a guide and never a measure of you.