When I meet people for the first time and the subject of what I do comes up, inevitably so does my coaching which includes, but is not limited to The Law of Attraction. Many also associate this concept with the cult hit movie, “The Secret.” Nearly half the time the other person hasn’t heard of it, but for those who have, the response is split in slightly in favor of those who like it versus those who discount it. Recently, I was speaking with a very well educated teacher who quickly blurted out, “It’s complete rubbish, and the people who were on it are just a bunch of the biggest losers.” Our time was brief and I wanted to know more, but there has indeed been a backlash against the movie amidst a tidal wave of disappointment.
So what was wrong with “The Secret?” The essence of the message has been around for nearly three thousand years and composes a central underlying theme common to most all the world’s great religions and philosophies. Rhonda Byrne didn’t create anything new – far from it. She simply modernized the often-told message adding a false conspiracy theme that its essence was purposely hidden from the common folks. While that is rubbish, Byrne’s basic tenets were valuable, and it serves us little to throw the baby out with the bath water.
The problem with Byrne’s message was that it was far too simplistic and incomplete. I would describe her as the “Queen of the Wish Fairies” and had she followed her own advice, the message would have never come out and she would have never become a very wealthy woman. You see she espoused three steps – to ask for what you want, to intensely believe and behave as if you already possess what you want, and to be in alignment to receive. The secret to “The Secret” was that she omitted the third step – the work. You simply must take inspired action! Had Byrne not taken the massive, relentless action she never would have met her financier/manager Bob Rainone, and she’d still be broke. To her credit, she took massive action. Massive, persistent, inspired action is what was missing from her message. Sorry Rhonda, you missed the boat and disappointed “Wish Fairies” around the world. What you proclaimed in “The Secret” was only part of the equation.
Interestingly, I was the only Law of Attraction coach to be asked to do a “spin-off” product under the auspices of “The Secret.” The subject was golf, and my instructions were to “keep the message simple and for the masses.” Of course, I included “taking action” as part of my message as too many do not assume that it is obvious. I ended up with ownership of the work and it is now available at www.golfshigherplane.com.
Here are ten steps to help you better understand and implement the very valuable message of The Law of Attraction. And by the way, I’ve met several of the fellow teachers featured in “The Secret” and most are energetic, loving, giving, accomplished, busy helping many others, seemingly happy and at peace with themselves – hardly losers, but rather heroes in my eyes.
1. Take simple and massively outrageous action.
This is where “The Secret” failed with its message. If we sit around on our butts and work diligently to try and change how we think and feel and don’t get into action, most of us will be sorely disappointed. Combine right thinking and feeling with right action and then you truly have a winning combination.
2. It’s about giving, not just getting.
If you think that The Law of Attraction is about materialism, narcissism, or greed, the issue maybe more about your perspective. It can also be about giving and you may have to shift your own focus to see that. When we get caught up in attracting what we want, we can forget that “the giver is truly blessed.” Learn to give without wanting something back in return. That’s true giving and it opens up the floodgates of creation.
3. It’s not all about you so stop blaming yourself.
When we feel like we’re responsible, it’s not an excuse to blame ourselves for every little thing that happens in our lives. Love yourself as you are instead. You should try to understand that The Law of Attraction is not only working around you, but everyone else has their own energy fields and their Law of Attraction or that of a group can sometimes overpower yours. It’s not a matter of good or bad, simply what is. Our ego wants to assign blame or reason for everything, and sometimes that’s just beyond our comprehension.
4. Be aware of your feelings, but don’t worry about them.
When we try to think and feel positively, we fall on our faces because we’re denying how we truly think and feel and are simply trying to paint a happy face on top of less happy thoughts and feelings. The most powerful way to move forward is to illuminate the inner negatives, but let go of them and uncover or make room for the inner positive ones, which are right here, right now.
5. Begin to tell a different story.
Our words convey powerful energy and our stories of the past and thoughts of the future have self-fulfilling powers to them. If you want different results, you can easily begin with giving up your addiction to the way you thought things were and look at them from a new perspective. Re-write your stories to create different results. Savor the present no matter what and discover what is actually here now and respond to what is.
6. Follow your heart and not your head and ego.
When we think we can simply manipulate our thoughts, feelings and beliefs to get what we can, we may forget that we are not alone on this planet and everything any of us does affects everyone else. Start adding what’s in everyone’s highest and best good to your goals. Our head and ego will lie to us at every opportunity, but our heart and gut will not. Follow your heart.
7. Garbage In, Garbage Out.
What are you saying, watching, or listening to? Who are you associating with? What stories do you tell? Yes, our minds are like computers, and if we put garbage in, we will get garbage out. However, we are not our minds, our thoughts, feelings or beliefs. What we are is that which is aware of or present to all that we experience. You only experience through your senses and tiny experiences reality. And as people begin to experience this for themselves, they also experience tremendous relief and greater clarity.
8. Thoughts are not things.
Sorry! This sounds great, but it’s just not true. Thoughts are just symbols that represent memories that we have given meaning to and invest our energy in. You would be better positioned by fully engaged in the present moment, because that is all the reality we really every have. If we stop believing in our thoughts as being so real, we can discover something beyond thinking: the source of true power.
9. Open yourself to the flow of life.
Let go of your oars and go with the flow. When we try and impose our will on ourselves and everything and everyone else, we lose track of our essence and our humanity. What if everything is unfolding as it should be unfolding in this moment? What if we are all part of the whole, a greater organism, a greater intelligent energy? Have you ever considered that?
10. You are a part of love and source energy. As such, you are enough.
Contrary the rampant consumerism in America, the one who has the most toys when they die does not win! They leave without their toys. We are not our toys and more of them is not going make us happy. If you turn and look inside, you can discover that right here, right now you are enough as you are — and this changes everything. Finally when you move toward your highest self which is love, and away from fear, you create begin to fully leverage The Law of Attraction!
Bob Fagan was the only Law of Attraction coach to be asked to develop spin-off products for “The Secret.” In addition to his product, “Golf’s Higher Plane,” Bob has penned a book on “Sports” and also a mainstream book called “The Bliss-ipline Factor” that has alternatively been called “The Advanced Secret” and “The Secret on Steroids.” He can be reached for coaching at email@example.com.