Love: Attracting the Wrong Type of Partner?


Are you hoping to meet a wonderful man or woman, but you keep attracting the wrong type of person?  Do you constantly meet men or women who are emotionally unavailable?  This issue keeps coming up with many who are seeking new relationships.


Perhaps you have finished a relationship through divorce, death, or a simple parting.  You may have even done a lot of introspective work identifying the characteristics you want in a partner.  Yet you wonder why you keep meeting exciting people or good matches, but they are simply not available for a variety of reasons.  You may be getting frustrated.  What’s up?


We attract that which we ourselves put out.  I would venture to say that the reason that you are not attracting the right person is because you, yourself, are not ready.  Check out “the mirror” because the answer may be right there – the fear of intimacy.


You may even be saying you’re ready and ever so frustrated with your results, but deep down you are more likely coming from a position of fear and not ready to open yourself up, to be intimate with another.  The result is that is you are attracting essentially the same type of person you are.


I’ve lived this very scenario myself multiple times and have witnessed it hundreds of times in others I coach.  Here’s what I suggest.


Find a quiet place each day for yourself for ten minutes.  Breathe, quiet yourself, and connect with your loving heart place.  Discover who YOU really are.  There will be some of you who cast this off as nonsense for maybe you actually are afraid or uncomfortable of being alone and intimate with yourself.  Maybe you want a quick solution.  Sorry, do it anyway and put aside your judgment.  If you hear your mind chattering, allow it, but continue.  Do it every day.


It can be difficult for us to stop and see who we truly are – a step in our growth journey.  I predict that you will begin to discover that you are uniquely wonderful and most likely more powerful than you have ever imagined.  And if you discover unpleasant things about yourself, forgive yourself and decide if you want to grow and change.  As you continue this journey that can take weeks or months, you will be sending out the very vibes to attract others on a similar journey or energy.  In essence, become the person you want to attract.


Be patient with yourself and this process.  This is not a quick-fix though sometimes the results can surprise us.  Only once you become honest and open with yourself can you expect that you will attract others who are the same and “available.”  So don’t blame others; the Universe is offering us a mirror in which to help us become our best selves, and in the process send out the frequencies that will indeed attract the people that truly resonate with us.


As always, enjoy the journey!

Leave a Reply

  • (will not be published)