Ode to Miller Chill

ChillBottleI never had a Miller Chill—
I never hoped to have one.
As Miller gulps a bitter pill
I’ll happily forego that fun.

“Trimming low-value SKU’s,”
Is biz-speak for this loser–
From the start it seemed a ruse
Avoided by savvy boozers.

As goes Chill went Southpaw Light
And Red Dog is surely limping
One wonders if this crew is tight
And what the heck they’re thinking.

A hint of lime a pinch of salt
Went into this brewing crime
And AB is just as much at fault
With its ghastly Bud Light Lime.

Yet MillerCoors bravely marches on
Seemingly devoid of fear,
Seeking “high net revenue brands”–
And never mentioning beer.

[According to Advertising Age, 11/12/13, MillerCoors announces it will be pulling the plug next year on Miller Chill.]

TOPICS: Beer on TAP, Lifestyle Tags: , , , , ,

ABOUT: Tom Bedell

Tom has written about golf and golf travel for American Airlines’ luxury magazine Celebrated Living since 1999, and for Travel & Leisure Golf, Golf Connoisseur, Virtuoso Life, Lexus Magazine, Acura Style, Tee It Up, American Way, The Met Golfer and many others. Before his first golf article, Tom had established his chops as a beer expert; as far as he knows he remains the only member of both the Golf Writers Association of America and the North American Guild of Beer Writers.

6 Responses to “Ode to Miller Chill”

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  1. The Golf Travel Guru

    Great review. Given the choice, however, which is better to wash down my nacho chips at the High Velocity Sports Bar @TPCSanAntonio? Miller Chill or Bud Light Lime?

  2. Bill K.

    The sad thing is they’ll just change the bottle of some other crappy product and the sheep will still flock unless otherwise converted.

  3. Tom Bedell

    Doesn’t sound like much of a choice, Ace. Sounds like, “When did you stop beating your wife?” Luckily, there were quite a few choices at the High Velocity.

  4. The Golf Travel Guru

    You are right. I think I’ll stick with my Shiner Bock the next time I’m in Texas. Too bad I couldn’t give a test run on the course to see if it had enough octane to improve my swing.

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