Hey you. Yes, the one with the golf bag shaped like R2D2. The one that looks like you’re overcompensating for something. Yeah, we’re talkin’ to you. Does your bag have to be so large? We’re playing golf here, not smuggling barrels of oil. You have the same number of clubs that we do, the same band-aids and rain gear, yet your bag comes with a horsepower rating.
In this economy—in any economy—that thing is pretentious. It’s obscene. Unless sponsors pay you to walk around with that traveling billboard, lose it. Even if they are, it’s still too big. Nobody is impressed, even with your name stenciled on it. Bobby Jones just threw up in his mouth.
We live in a contemporary world that emphasizes and rewards efficiency, mobility and sensibility. The staff bag represents bloat, drag. It’s time to dump it and streamline.
It doesn’t have to be a vintage leather and plaid relic you scoured eBay a week for—you’re going for smart, not snobbery—just one that’s compact and airy. Titleist, Ping and Mountain Sun all make durable, affordable versions. The Checklist encourages you to be modern. Trust us, this is the good kind of downsizing. While you’re at it, you might think about shedding a few of those 14 clubs, but that’s another topic altogether.